A Funeral Is Not Sad, It's a Celebration!

Cue the sleepy, mournful trombones they play in New Orleans at a funeral, The Andy Reid Era is dead. Yesterday's game reminded me of the last time the Eagles tied in Baltimore. It was a moment where even the greatest of optimists could no longer argue that Andy Reid and his posse should stay in Philly. What ever happened to the good coach we saw early in his tenure, we will never know. He still may go on to coach a few strong years elsewhere in the league, but not here in Philly. Andy Reid thinks he is so freaking smart that it angers me to no end. He thinks his playcalling is clever, thinks that his mantras actually soothe the masses, and he thinks that all-you-can-eat cheeseburgers is a good idea the night before a game. When every problem the Reid Era has ever had reared their ugly heads yesterday, and Andy had no idea on how to stop the obvious and profuse bleeding, it drove a stake right through the heart of this team. We couldn't run the ball, the clock management was terrible, Andy almost challenged an obviously correct call, Donovan couldn't hit the broadside of a barn, the recievers had the dropsies, the linebackers were torched by TJ Hoosyomama and Ryan Freaking Fitzpatrick, and the playcalling was worse than what I could muster around 3 am in the midst of a full on rock out session in 2004 (if that joke doesn't make sense to you, picture a couple dudes in a room, each pounding Natty Ice because that's all that's left from the party, each playing a predesignated air instrument, and Pearl Jam's "Crazy Mary" from the State College show in 2003 hitting full throttle with the sound system as loud it could possibly go (we did this so often that the stereo system didn't survive more than 2 years)). That long sentence covers every single concern that has ever been raised during the Reid Era, all of which Andy has tried to convince us aren't that big of a deal in his "system".

Keep in mind, I'm not bitter at all. Instead of proclaiming the Eagles season dead and doing things on Sundays, let's turn these last six games into a celebration! Let's enjoy the outgoing Era. It could be one giant, six week, drinking game for example. For every blown challenge, chug a beer. For every 10 second span wasted so that Donovan can catch his breath, drink for 5 seconds. For every dropped pass, drink for 2 seconds. The possibilities are endless, however there is one caveat. Each rule must be directly tied to the Andy Reid Era. Or we could just finally appreciate the genius of Andy Reid. He is a genius, you know.... A comedic genius! Watching him coach is like watching Chappelle do stand up. He's great! His timing is impeccable and you never really know whats coming. Or we could play the "how many jelly beans are in Andy Reid" game. Closest without going over wins. See what I mean, this isn't a bad thing by any means. Now, we don't have to worry about being even remotely successful and just have fun.

In all seriousness, though, I am worried that Jeff Lurie and Joe Banner aren't going to see this post. I have a terrible feeling that we are just going to get rid of Donovan and let Andy stick around. Then all we'll get is the Andy Reid Era v1.5 (I'm counting the Doug Pederson year as v0.5). Look, I realize the vast shortcomings of Donovan McNabb, however, I'm pretty confident that given the right system he could still be ok. Given an offense that plays to his capabilities instead of ignoring them, I think he would still put up good numbers. An example of such an offense would be something with a more vertical passing game and more emphasis on the run. Lots more emphasis on the run. For what the Eagles are looking to run, however, he is not a good fit. He's not a precision passer, plain and simple.

Aside from Andy and Donovan, I can't shake the feeling that this is a good team. There is talent in so many places on the roster, that 5-4-1 reads more like 3-7. While not mathematically eliminated, this team is all but finished. All I know is, round 1 of the Andy Reid Era game starts next weekend at my place. Let the games begin!